a charity supporting parents & carers of challenging children
HELPP Help Education and Learning for Parents by Parents accepts no liability for the consequences of any actions taken on the basis of the information provided in this web-
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Tips for parents -
Try to sort things out away from other people.
“George, can I see you for a second?”
Ask your child to come in a pleasant but firm voice.
Leave the room yourself and your child will usually follow.
Say it with a word.
If we nag, preach or put our children down, they resent it and we may give them a low opinion of themselves. Instead if your child does not seem to hear, try saying it again with just a word. Talk firmly to show you mean business.
If the problem keeps occurring, try putting up a sign.
Hang me up, please……Signed "your coat!!"
Wait until your child has calmed down.
Then reason with them. It’s harder to sort things out with a cross child. Suggest you both need time to talk.
Say “sorry” when you get things wrong.
You don’t have to win. When you say “sorry” you will be teaching your child to sort problems out, that it’s okay to make mistakes and how to get on in the world.
Give your child a way out.
Children find it hard to make the first move. Show them how to start again without grudges. “Come on; let’s make a start on these toys together.”
Learn to compromise.
One of the most important tools to use with children is the art of compromise. Learning to compromise within the constraints of your family can be a challenge for all family members. Start with simple trade offs, before working your way up to dealing with tougher issues. Remember that your children learn by example, and as parents you should set good examples for your children to follow.